The examples in red below are Wrong. Can you correct them ? The corrections are in blue.
e.g. technology have lead to many advancements (has led)
e.g. Although technology can divide, however, it can also unite (use either ‘although’ or ‘however, but not both)
e.g. I agree to the first writer (agree with)
4) Subject-verb agreement
e.g. Technological advancement are needed to increase our standard of living. (is)
5) Countable and uncountable nouns
e.g. Lesser jobs are created (fewer jobs)
e.g. There is lesser difficulty than before. (less difficulty)
e.g. … to ensure the economical growth of our country (economic)
e.g. The government must promote economic and social progression of the country (progress)
7) Excluding ‘the’
e.g. Government must help (the government)
e.g. Media can change our values (the media)
e.g. Arts can make money (the arts)
8) The use of the words critics/supporters/detractors/opponents/supporters/sceptics/advocates
Using these words alone, without any explanation is vague, slows down the reader since he is forced to make sense of it, and seems quite meaningless showy.
Please clarify : e.g. Supporters of social media say that… / Critics of the education system assert that … / Advocates of freedom put forth the view that …
9) Informal words
kids – children
old folk – the elderly
stuff – things / matters / issues
10) Contradictions in writing due to ineffective word choice
I agree with the writer, but there are some parts where I do not agree with the writer.
End of intro : Therefore, I disagree to a large extent with the claim that the poor are to be blamed for their poor state.
Followed by the Start of first body paragraph : To begin, the poor are to be blamed because they have bad habits and practices